As I'm sitting in my room thinking, I realize that we have almost every little thing (even table cloths) on my check list checked off. What?! Is this real life? Sam and I did it! Without a wedding planner...without much financial help...with just each other! How amazing!
But then I'm convicted...Wait...we didn't do this, God did. He gave us the tools and the ideas to make this day wonderful. What a blessing! I am seriously so excited I can barely contain myself. One month and a half to go and we will be one in Christ! And then suddenly tears start rolling down my cheek...a mix between happy...stress...thoughts...curiosity...and it all just seems to be overwhelming; however, one thought always seems to be highlighted over everything else. I have heard these frequently and it always just sticks.
"Caitlyn, it's a wedding...it's just one day...it's really not that big of a deal...you're too detailed...not much is going to change anyways...getting married is fun, but just give it a few years..."
I don't know, maybe I'm being a little too ecstatic...but, i am way beyond excited for this day! And here's why: (by the way, these are not in any order)
-We were literally made for each other.
While this seems pretty cliché, it's very true that Sam and I were made for each other. We kind of work like a puzzle. Where one lacks, the other fulfills. We make a great team (even in ministry work)! We just kind of click. We both have a heart for God and we run the race together daily. I mean sure, there are days when one of us is ahead of the other...but we know for sure that we will meet at the finish line when our work on earth is finished. Until then, we keep on truckin! ;)
-Spending my whole life with Sam.
Another cliché "soon to be married" comment. But really, Sam and I are about to start our whole lives together and I couldn't be more anxious to see what God has in store for our future. Maybe a baby later on down the road ;) Divorce is not a thing for us...it never will be. (Malachi 2:16) we know we will have our struggles, but we also know that we have a God who is for us!
-Becoming one in Christ.
Okay but really, this is the coolest thing to me! Marriage in Christ becomes a covenant with the man and woman; one in Christ and one with each other by an act of will from each. What a wonderful thought! It's a Godly mystery really but I am so glad I get to be a part of it! Not only do I have Christ living in me and Sam has Christ living in him...but when we are married we will be one through Christ, by Christ, and for Christ! Sounds like an eternal joy to me! (1 Corinthians 6:17) (Mark 10:6) (John 17:20) I am so in love with God and He is the one that gives me the love I deeply have for Sam! What a beautiful exchange!
-Not a new life, but a changed one.
So yeah, Sam and I both have our lives as it is now. I go to school everyday and wait until 5:00pm to come around so I can see him! It's always exciting to me! After that...we eat supper together, do our devotions and pray...and then it's time for him to go to sleep (at our new house) so we can do it all over again the next day. It's so hard for him to leave every night. No! We don't live together. Not yet. We have decided to wait to fulfill our relationship until our wedding night because...well that's what God commands of us. He stays at our house and I stay at Grandma's. So...that means that I have a new house to move into with my awesome future husband! It is so surreal to me...our very own kitchen!Our very own yard! Our very own house!!! We have totally remodeled the inside of it to make it exactly how we like (with a small budget of course). It's wonderful and already full of awesome memories that I thank God for every day!
-It's my dream come true.
It is...I don't know if it's just me, but God has placed a true dream within my heart to get married since...well forever. I knew I wanted to get married young. As you all know, I went through a tough time with my past relationship just because I think our sight for God was lost and God was slowly put on the back-burner. It just wasn't my time yet...and now, I'm so thankful for God telling me no. God always has a plan...and every time, His plan blows mine out of the water! I'm not going to lie and say that planning for another wedding has been easy, because it hasn't; however, I am thankful for the reassurance of my understanding fiancé and the reassurance of our loving Father. God always reminds me that He is the King of arranged marriages! He knows who is best for me!
The big finish: So, it is only natural for me to want to make this day amazing. To be honest, we haven't spent much money...we are using our resources ;) We make it a priority to not idolize the wedding day and we attempt to seek God in every part of our planning process. The only thing that we have spent an abundant amount of time doing is planning,many Pinterest projects, and other odds and ends to make this day fabulous. This wedding isn't necessarily about us either, we want God to be glorified in every way possible. God has literally provided everything for us.
So here it is, I'm sorry to my friends and family if I seem a little star-struck and my vocabulary only consists of wedding stuff. I'm sorry to my friends that I haven't given you the proper time to grow our friendship because I'm so focused on Sam and our life with Christ. I'm sorry to anyone who is annoyed by my Facebook posts and maybe even this blog post...it's really exciting to me...I've been engaged for almost a year and the time is coming so if ya could hold on just a little longer and hold back all of your negative comments...that'd be great. I love you all.
See you December 19th as I walk down the aisle! 💗
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